Paroo

Did your relationship pass away? Did your startup die after 3 investors and one Canva logo? Has your gym motivation been missing since January? For $15, I will write a fully personalized, dramatic funeral speech for it. Structured like a real ceremony: • Opening tribute • The life it lived • The cause of death • Final farewell Tone options: – Elegant & literary – Dark humor – Cold and analytical You tell me what died. I give it the ceremony it deserves. Because closure is better when it’s theatrical. 700-1000 words