Read a game character's lines and check the Afro-Surinamese details feel right (30 min, remote)

we're making a small, gentle video game (kal's valley) where families from many backgrounds have resettled a green valley after a long drought. one of the characters is Afro-Surinamese: bram (afro-surinamese). we want someone who is Afro-Surinamese / Surinamese - or grew up with it - to read their lines and tell us whether anything is wrong, odd, stereotyped or disrespectful, and what would make them feel more real.

all text in the game is lowercase on purpose (a style choice). the valley is vegetarian (family recipes are adapted). the game shows heritage quietly, through food, words and objects, not explanations.

about the character: Heritage: Afro-Surinamese. Greets you "odi!". His mother brought pom to the first show, Rosa's brought mole, and nobody's settled which was better. Who: a tinkerer who built the drones, the helper bots, and Pip.

the lines (one per row, as they appear in the game):

• odi! bram. i built those drones. and the helper bots. and pip, come to that.
• three of my bots are stuck about the valley, and my hands won't hold a wrench any more.
• you'd mend them? they're simple things. that was the point.
• wren's let that tin out of her sight? then here. pomtajer.
• my mother grated it for pom every year. by hand. took her all morning.
• it's thirsty, and slow. more patience than i've got, these days.
• all three going again! and your scooter - see what they did to it?
• i helped build the old grid, you know. when i was young. too big to mend, in the end.
• small things can be mended. that's the whole idea.
• s drone: his hands won
• juni wants a drone of her own. course she does. she's never even seen them fly.
• i'd build her one. but look at my hands. can't hold an iron steady.
• you be my hands? i'll do the talking.
• a motor off one of the old cars on the highway. the cell from the pylon's lamp, by the path.
• and props. ravi whittles. he'll say no first.
• ...crew nine. pip showed me.
• we put that one up in four days. sang the whole time.
• it's a flower. whatever rosa says.
• that rusted pylon by the path? my generation's.
• rosa's mother brought mole to the first show. mine brought pom. nobody's settled which was better.
• the old highway ran right through here. now look at it.
• fleet's ready. listen to that hum.
• ...not for half a valley, though. there's still boards on windows.
• my mother wouldn't let the drones up till the pom was on the table. nor will i.
• listen to that hum.
• alright. it was both. a flower and a sun.
• both hands on that. i'd have it in the grass by now.
• got it loose? good. send it round to me after. it'll want looking at.
• odi! mind the - well. it's your scooter now.
• hear those rotors? mine. sweet as anything.
• i steer, mostly.
• drowned? hang it on kal's line. dry by lunch.
• don't watch the hands. watch the work.
• good blow. kal's turbines'll be singing.
• coffee's on. it's always on. rosa says that's the trouble.
• too much pom last night. no such thing, my mother said.
• can't sleep either? the old grid hummed at this hour. i miss the hum.
• anything that won't go. i'll tell you why.

please send back (text):

1. your connection to the culture (e.g. 'telugu, grew up in hyderabad' - no personal details needed)
2. anything wrong or off: words, names (amma, tata, teta, lola...), dishes, customs, how family members are addressed - quote the line and say what you'd change
3. anything that feels stereotyped or like a tourist's view
4. 1-3 small, specific details that would make this family feel more real (a word, a habit, an object, a dish)

it's fine to say 'this all feels right' if it does - but please say why.